Marriage trouble is not a question of if but when. Marriage can be great if you are blessed with the right person for you or hellish if you made the biggest mistake of your life. Of course there is an in-between but it for the most part just depends on how long you have been married. If you are only a few years into to it you’re just figuring things out. If you are 5 to 7 years into it you’re probably trying to figure out how to get out of it. Some folks are of the opinion that if you make it past 10 years you’ve got a shot to go the distance.
Let’s be honest about your marriage. I’m guessing you really had no idea what you were doing. You were so blinded by love or lust that you headed into marriage with blinders on. I believe that’s how most of us entered into matrimony. Our thinking was, were in love and that’s all that matters. Unfortunately as the song in the 80’s stated, “Whats love got to do with it, it’s just a second hand emotion?” Is this really true? Is love just a second hand emotion?
There are some signs that might give you a clue that your marriage is in trouble. I have listed some random thoughts below for your reading pleasure about marriage trouble. They are in no particular order but rather as they popped into my mind. I hope none of these are present in your relationship.
- Your spouse never hugs or kisses you anymore
- You read an intimate text message on your spouse’s phone
- If your spouse showers and sprays perfume or cologne before heading to the gym
- When you get a call from someone asking who you are (probably a jealous affair partner)
- If your spouse shows very little concern over health issues you are dealing with
- When your spouse is trying to hide expenses from you
- If your marital problems are being posted on social media sites
- Your birthday and anniversary are unimportant to your spouse
- When your spouse repeatedly makes financial decisions without your input
- Your spouse gives the appearance of being single when you are out in public together, refusing to hold hands or acknowledge that you are together
- If you or your spouse gets a kick out of doing mean things
- If you are happy when you are apart and depressed when you are together
- When physical abuse is present in the relationship
- Small arguments lead to a comment about getting a divorce
- Your spouse spends the night away from home not on a business trip
- You fight on a daily basis
- Everyone else sees you have relationship problems but you overlook them
Obviously there are many signs that should give you clues that something is wrong with your relationship. Take heart that no marriage is perfect. However, the first step in dealing with marriage problems is admitting you have some. Once you get past step one, you can move forward on eliminating them, one by one.
If you are struggling with your marriage, please read more on saving your marriage here;
Saving Your Marriage